Film Review: Arcade (1993)

Also known as: Arcatron (Spain), Cyber World (Germany)
Release Date: July 20th, 1993 (Germany)
Directed by: Albert Pyun
Written by: David S. Goyer, Charles Band
Music by: Alan Howarth, Tony Riparetti
Cast: Megan Ward, Peter Billingsley, John de Lancie, Sharon Farrell, Seth Green, A.J. Langer, Bryan Dattilo

Full Moon Entertainment, Paramount Pictures, 85 Minutes

Review:

“Games like Arcade go beyond interaction. I’m telling you, man, Virtual Reality is the way of the future!” – Nick

Arcade is a movie about a video game machine called “Arcade”, which is confusing, as the place where video game machines are held is called an “arcade”. Did the makers of the game not have any creativity? Well, if you actually see their game in this movie, the answer is definitely “yes.”

This movie is terrible in the way that sitting in the waiting area of a pediatric doctor’s office in a room full of fussy sick kids with millennial parents handing them iPads is terrible.

This actually has some known people in it. John de Lancie, Q from Star Trek, actually plays a sort of sinister corporate asshole that runs the company that manufactured this killer arcade game. Then you have Megan Ward, most notably from Encino Man, Seth Green, A.J. Langer and A Christmas Story‘s Ralphie, Peter Billingsley.

Granted, the acting lineup isn’t one that should wow anyone but considering that this is the cast of a Full Moon movie, the lineup is somewhat impressive.

The film is about a killer arcade machine that lures in teens, throws some shoddy virtual reality at them and eats their souls. Actually, I sat through this entire thing and I’m not really sure I even understand how it works.

I’ve heard people knock the video game and its look but this isn’t too dissimilar from what virtual reality technology was at the time, as far as its visuals went. However, the game is of very poor design and completely uninteresting, nonsensical and looks like an absolute bore to play. I mean, you skateboard through a dungeon with kitchen utensils sticking out of the wall, trying to avoid a yellow ball of light.

I don’t know how this movie has a 5.2 on IMDb. People have no taste.

It’s films like this that made me wish I didn’t have to do a full write up and I could just do movie reviews with a simple GIF reflecting my reaction after seeing them.

Rating: 3.75/10
Pairs well with: Brainscan and The Lawnmower Man.